i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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