Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
