We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
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