Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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