Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
