i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
