i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
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