just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Randomize
