trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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