school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
