Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
