You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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