Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
