how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
