So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
