do herpes really smell.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
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