let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
