so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
