is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
