Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
