Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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