i think i have herpe
just one?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
