My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Randomize
