Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Randomize
