id be glad to
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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