If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
