That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I need to calm my uterus...
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize