Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
