Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
