I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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