bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
The air taste purple.
Randomize
