went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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