after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
