your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
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