we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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