dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
