the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize