hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize