In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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