She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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