Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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