who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize