Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
