I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
