oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
i dont even know how to be here
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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