I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize