we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
