I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
