she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Randomize
