I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
