Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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